My 1st birthday party! - amended

I think I have arrived at this world for one year. But why can’t I walk and can’t speak? I have been to the park for three times. I also need to go there today. Mama looked very happy, but I could not ask her why she looked so happy. I played with the children there for about two hours. Then Mama took me to the supermarket and bought a lot of food like sausages, pineapples, chips, etc. Afterwards, we went back home and she jotted something down. Mama took me to take the bus and went to Ocean Park to buy two tickets.

We entered the park, and I played the merry-go-round with Mama first. My grandparents arrived and we went to the restaurant to take lunch. I could eat a bit of porridge. It was my first time eating it, and it was very delicious. After we finished lunch, we played other thrill rides.

Afterwards, we went to the Ocean Theater to see dolphins and sea lions. Those dolphins were very lovely and we took a lot of photos. We were all tired and we took a bus home.

They were all busy to make dinner when we were home. I played with my sister in the living room for about an hour. Papa was holding a very big box when he came back. But he didn’t let me know what was inside the box. I was very curious, and always touched that box. I guessed that thing inside might be eatable.

Mama was afraid that I would break the box, so she put the box into the refrigerator carefully. I was unhappy and my sister cheered me up with a toy. After a moment, Mama took some sausages and pineapples to me and I ate them all. There was a lot of food during dinner. I ate a lot and they also gave me some juice. This was my first sip of juice.

We chatted after dinner. Suddenly, father took the box out, and sang a birthday song to me. It was a birthday cake inside that box. They divided the cake into many pieces. Papa blew the candle together with me. Then, we finished the cake happily. I had an unforgettable birthday.

SCORE:

2.5/5 (content) 3/5 (grammar)